Pants,
I have a question for you. Cafferty and I spent New Years Eve together in NOLA (and whew...we survived), but we went to the restaurant that served flirtinis. We both commented on how this was your favorite drink, but didn't know why. Where did your flirtini addiction come from? And can you give the recipe for The Pants' Flirtini???
Have a great 2009 Pants!
Angie
Happy 2009 Angie!!! Thanks for thinking of the Pants when you were in NOLA (Were you in Villanova? Land of Granola? Or New Orleans? Because if you were in New Orleans I hope you were careful! The Pants has heard that people from there will shoot you for no reason!!). Good question about the Pants' adoration of the flirtini!! The flirtini has been a longtime companion of the Pants, but the Pants has never told the story of why. Here it is, in print for the first time, for your reading pleasure:
Three years ago, The Pants was in Town Lake Animal Shelter and after my time on the streets, the Pants was looking a little rough and had lost most of my mojo. Also, the Pants was sort of shy back then so I wasn't really strutting my stuff to convince a human person to adopt me. One night, after all the human persons were gone, one of the older labs that everyone called "Big Mama" came to talk to me. She said "Pants, you need to loosen up. Chillax a little bit. (Big Mama was totally hip with the newest street talk) Big Mama is going to make you a special treat." Five minutes later she came back to my cage with two glasses filled with the most intoxicating beverage on earth. After just one of them, the Pants felt SOOOOOOOOO goood!! Like the Big Guy does after two glasses of wine! (but NOT like him after 5 glasses of wine. He is kinda annoying then.) I asked Big Mama what was this nectar of the gods called? "It's a flirtini." she replied.
That night, the Pants created the famous Pants Dance as I could not stop dancing around and around and around. I was totally hooked on flirtinis!!! Once I went to Westie Pet Rescue in Austin, I totally employed my newfound dance moves (using the occasional flirtini to help me remember) to get Jessica to adopt me. Which in and of itself isn't that cool, but then she introduced me to the Big Guy!! Rapture!!!! So flirtinis saved my life! I love them!!!
As for the Pants' secret recipe - I'll tell you how I make mine but you can adjust according to your own tastes Angie friend! However, you will need vodka, champagne and pineapple juice. I recommend the kind of champagne that has bubbles in it and the kind of pineapple juice that hasn't been sitting in the refrigerator for 3 or more years. Fresh ingredients are key!! I'm not exactly sure of how much of each to put in (I can't reach the measuring cups in the cabinet, so I just sort of wing it), but more champagne with bubbles and juice than vodka. Once it's mixed together, put sugar around the rim...the Pants LOVES sugar! Then, voila, you have your very own Flirtini!! You can add a little bit of color to it too! A cherry, a piece of pineapple, a greenie, a bone, etc. all work great!
Mmmmm. Sweet, sweet booze.
So ring me up Angie, and we'll have a flirtini night here in town!! I would come to Houston, but I can't drive a car - not that I haven't tried!! Alright, Jessica is about to get up (ugh!), so I better make myself a flirtini to get me in the right frame of mind. Later!
4 comments:
Pants - I just read your Twilight review (because I finally went and saw it and didn't want a spoiler). I think you need to read the books. Yes, there were crazy, outlandish, comical parts, but the teen angst will get you. I liked it. I think you need to give the books a read. It may bring you closer to Jessica? Maybe.
While I thank you for your post Jennifer friend, I must insist that I NOT read the Twilight books. While I enjoyed the movie very much, reading the books would only serve to open a door for discussion with Jessica, and that is unacceptable to the Pants! I have to deal with her enough as it is!! Also, the Pants's literary tastes are on a higher plain than those of Jessica. For example, Laura recently lent the Pants "American Wife", which I enjoyed very much!! I also recently read The Brothers Karamazov, which, while interesting and educational, was much to bleak, cold, depressing, and Russian for the Pants's taste!! It required the drinking of mass amounts of flirtinis to complete! If you have any high-end literature you would like to recommend to the Pants, I would love to hear it!
Thanks so much Pants for the story of the flirtini. I will order one tonight and toast to you!!!
I love you Aunt A! Hit me up with a text yo!
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