Mozart is a super big and super...ummm.."playful" french poodle who I think drinks a case of Red Bull every morning. He is like the Energizer Bunny on speed, crystal meth and mountain dew! He never stops!! Kind of like the Terminator in T2, except without the cool special effects.
Now, I do love the Mozart and I know the Mozart loves the Pants, but man, he just needs cool out like the Fonz sometimes. (Hey, if Jessica and the Big Guy can to see a bunch of has-beens like Cheap Trick in concert, I can totally make Fonzie references!! Nobody is cooler than the Fonz!!)
Whenever I get to come over to Laura's house, after riding in the land boat, I run inside to say what's up to my BFFs Tico and Coco (And Samantha if she's there, cause she is one cool human person!!) and before I can even say hey or give them a fist bump, here comes Mozart, at like 5 times my size, sliding across the floor at me at 100mph!!! It looks like this! (prepare yourself reader peeps, this is not for the faint of heart!)
Then the Mozart always begins licking the Pants with his 4 foot long toungue!! I know it is just his way of saying "what up Pants?", but it's super, super gross. I don't like baths, especially saliva baths!! Seriously grosstastical!!! I am not cool with that Mozart!
Spit bathing aside, we do have fun with the Mozart! Since he's still a puppy, he is not very worldly like Coco, Tico and myself (he has never even wore doggles on a boat! he has not lived I tell you!!!) so we like to stump him with current event type questions. Oh man, he gets sooooo confused!!! Like this weekend, Tico and I were having a passionate discussion about illegal immigration and its effect on the U.S. economy, when we asked Mozart if he thought Obama or McCain had the best plan. This was totally the look he gave us!!
We laughed and laughed!!! I mean look at that face!! LOL!!!
So all in all, Mozart is pretty cool - he's just young. However, I think he could eat me if he ever wanted to, so I hope he doesn't read this blog and get mad!!! You are the tops Mozart!!
On the subject of blogs, all dogs should have one! Being a dog is super stressful sometimes (you humans have no idea!), and I can always rely on my blog to vent and blow off steam. But some people think my blog is silly and stupid. Can you believe this reader peeps??!!! I am outraged! The injustice!! The discrimination!!! For instance this guy, who I will only refer to as "Captain Poopface", thinks my blog is silly and doesn't think that I write it myself:
Well Captain Poopface, I am working on an online degree from UTEP (the "Harvard of West Texas") and you can't get an online degree from UTEP if you can't read and write! Such misconceptions about the Pants!!! I may not have opposable thumbs, but if you cut me do I not bleed??!! (sigh) As long as there are Captain Poopface types out there, the Pants will continue to blog and continue to fight for truth, justice and the American way. At least I will whenever I'm not hiding from the Mozart.
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