Either way, you best get used to the Pants being all up in your grill! Like this!
Ummm...why do I look like a 1980's one hit wonder here?
I don't know if you know this, but the Pants is a big time sports fan. I'm talking HUGE sports fan peeps! I can't get enough. One time, the Big Guy and I watched sports for like 12 hours straight (Don't fret! Not actually 12 hours straight through. He fed me and took me to pee in between. The Big Guy always puts the Pants first!! Unlike Jessica, who usually puts tacos first LOL!!!) and when we were done he asked me if that was enough. I pawed at his shoulder to show him that my answer was clear - NO WAY! THE PANTS CAN'T GET ENOUGH!
The Big Guy doesn't like the Spurs because Spurs' fans used to think David Robinson was close to being as good as Hakeem Olajuwon. What? Silly Spurs! The Big Guy told me that every time they played, Hakeem would prove everyone wrong and would "bitch slap" Robinson. Oh Big Guy, your lingo is always so out of date and silly!
In no particular order, the teams I love and root for seriously hard core!
See Jesus? It's my Notre Dame jersey! Go Irish!
- Notre Dame (Especially football! Touchdown Jesus commands me to root for them! LOL!) This past season my favorite player was Golden Tate, he's the bomb diggity! I love him not only because he had the best name ever to play for the Irish, but because every game he was like 277 flavors of awesome! To show how silly the NFL draft is (without even discussing the general silliness of Chris Berman's face, Mel Kiper's hair or Steve Young's general mormon malaise), he didn't get picked until the end of the 2nd round. WTH! If I had been drafting first, I would have drafted Tate. If I had been picking second, I would have had my attorney file an injunction suing Team #1 so that I could draft Tate instead. (Don't worry peeps, my attorney isn't either Jessica or the Big Guy. I want to win my cases. ZING!)
Golden Tate - in action!
(At first I didn't like him because I thought his name was "Golden Taint." That would have been mildly damaging for his endorsement career)
Yes I am rooting for your team Jesus.
See Jesus? It's my Notre Dame jersey! Go Irish!- Rice (Especially baseball! Sorry they kind of suck this year Big Guy.
Yell at them Wayne! Tell them to shake themselves!
- UTEP - If I could get a degree from any school, it would totally be UTEP! The magical grounds out in El Paso are often referred to as "the Tennessee Tech of the Lower Midwest", the "Boise State of the South" and "the University of Awesome Bad-Assness." Oh UTEP. (sigh) I can't wait to finish my online degree from you and have your diploma on my wall! (I'm still trying to pick a major! OMG! So hard!)
UTEP!!
BASK IN THE UNBELIEVABLE GRANDEUR!!!
- Rockets and the Mavericks (tie) - The Big Guy loves his Rockets, but Jessica likes the Mavericks and totally grew up going to their camps. At first I was scared...the Mavs had concentration camps??!!! I know Mark Cuban is dorky and all, but I had no idea he put kids in camps! Turns out it was just wishful thinking that Jessica was in such a camp. (zinger!) Actually, Jessica told me that NBA teams put on "camps" where kids come in and get instruction from the NBA guys. Way cool! She went to the Ro Blackman camp! I don't know who he is, but the name "Ro" is cool!
Ro = Cool like Fonzie
I hated to say it, but going to NBA camps was pretty cool. Plus, I watched her and the Big Guy play some hoops in the GREATEST PARK IN THE HISTORY OF MANKIND (more to come on this later) and she's got some game. Don't tell her I said that. In fact, tell her that her jump shot is worse than John Starks'! The Pants is all about old school insults!
Sadly, the Rockets didn't make the playoffs this year, but the Mavs totally did! I'm typing this as I watch them play the dastardly Spurs! One thing the three of us all can agree on - the Spurs suck. They are totally sneaky and stupid! Go Mavs!
DUNK ON THEM BIG GERMAN GUY!!
I take that back Big Guy...that IS a bitch slap!
- Houston Astros - not only did the Big Guy grow up rooting for the Stros even though they've never won a title, but he got drafted by them! Seriously!
The Big Guy catching one in the minors. So dashing!
I like the Rangers okay too, but I mainly root for the Astros mainly because I hope against all hope that one day they will bring back their sweet rainbow uniforms. I heard they got rid of them because epileptic kids would go to home games and would have seriously major seizures each time the Stros took the field. That has to be true. I mean, why else would they ever get rid of sweet duds like these!
Lookin' good Cruz. Lookin' damn good.
Alright, I'm going to get back to the game and root the Mavs on. Hope all my reader peeps have a good weekend! I'm going to hit the sack and snuggle up to someone special - first name "Big", last name "Guy." Later!
Keepin' Austin weird.
3 comments:
Oh Pants. I love you even though you hate the completely awful Mavs.
Oh, Clancy, it's so GOOD to have you back!
Thanks Peeps! And sorry about not liking the Spurs SLynnRo...it's how I've been raised. Blame my parents!
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